WOW, it's been forevs since I blogged. I've been mourning the loss of my 20's and my arches...
My feet have been really hurting me since I moved to Kuwait and I kinda chalked it up to walking around on tile all the time... I had them checked out twice while I was Houston and if I had known the news the Dr. was going to give me I would have just put up with the pain.
I'd never been to the foot doctor before. I've never had any foot problems, I thought only old people had those?? My first visit fell a little short of my expectations. While I waited for the Dr. I caught up on my celeb gossip and tried to imagine the worst news that I would hear today: No more high heels.
I don't normally wear high heels in Kuwait, mostly b/c I'm inside all the time and they don't really go with my bathrobe. But up until this point, I didn't even own a pair of flats, much less any kind of sensible supportive shoe.
So I'm sitting on this little short table waiting for the doctor to come see me and looking at my feet stretched out in front of me. Dammit, shoulda gotten a pedicure. oops. He enters the room and introduces himself and immediately sits down and gets to work. He's bending my foot this way and that way and looks up at me, "Are your feet normally sweaty or are you just nervous?" <----WHAT???!! I wish I could have seen my face while my brain processed this question and then blurted out, "it's my first time, just nervous, i guess..." I had an Ally McBeal moment where I imagined leaning back on my hands and slapping him with my feet until he was spinning wildly in his little doctor chair.
He asked me a few other questions but I can't even remember what b/c half my brain was talking to my feet asking them to please turn off the water works and be on their best behavior.
Diagnosis: Short achilles tendon and hammer toes (yeah, that's right, HAMMER toes. sexy, right??)
He gave me a sheet of paper with exercises to help lengthen my tendon, wrote me a prescription for anti inflammatories, and then...the dagger in the heart, orthopedic shoes.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! He could tell by the horrific look on my face and the tears stinging the backs of my eyes that this was not positive news to me. I mean, sure, I'll do some stretches and yada yada, but DUUUUUDE - this was a death sentence.
He explained to me that I had put my feet in 'casts' (high heels) for the last 6 years and the pain I was experiencing was a result of NOT wearing high heels anymore!!! HUH? Dude, I can put my heels back on and we can pretend this never happened... No? That's not a solution? What? Orthopedics are my only option?
**I had a mini flashback to my first job out of college. The older ladies in the office that wore those short, chunky heels used to always tell me how they used to wear stilettos and that I should 'enjoy it while I can'. Why didn't they tell me the ugly truth?? Why did no one roll down their knee highs and show a young, impressionable girl the reality of the relationship between sky high heels and the inevitable hammer toe??**
To make things worse, the doctor himself pulled off his shoe and showed me that he too wore orthopedic inserts. Awesome. I left the office with my prescription and sat in the car in the parking lot. I looked at the 'bag of bones' that are my feet (yea, he called them that) and cried... I thought about all the things he had said to me. I stopped crying briefly when I remembered he told me that I could still wear high heels.... on special occasions... like my birthday... <----that's only ONCE A YEAR! more crying...
Ok, ok, ok, ok... I eventually pulled myself together... I've been in pain for months and the only way to correct this problem is to tackle it. With a very unattractive and supportive shoe.
I am now the not-so-proud-owner of a pair of orthopedic flip flops (yea, they make those), 2 pairs of supportive flats, orthopedic cross trainers, and a variety of orthopedic inserts. Yup, there goes all my bday money. poopers...
